My Own Private Guantanamo

Pranks, Power and Pop Culture


Just another Tuesday in exile

November 17, 2010

Boing Boing editor and reliable web trendsetter/watcher Xeni Jardin deactivated her personal Facebook account today. I really envy her taking the initiative. I wanted to play the “You can’t fire me cause I quit” card, but it’s hard to quit when you’re in exile. Is Jardin’s departure a harbinger of things to come? Will Facebook go the way of Myspace and become supplanted by something cooler, just around the corner? The last few months have felt to me like Facebook jumped the shark. Maybe it’s the presence of everyone’s parents or the increasing political tribalism or the inevitable creep of monetizing the social web. Whatever the reason, Facebook has been getting lamer and lamer.

Xeni Jardin cited privacy reasons, but I wonder if Facebook’s new Messages app also played a role. Zuckerberg’s gambit which seeks to compete with email (which is TOO SLOW for the kids these days) might sound like a good idea, but do you really want to turn control of your email over to a company with a proven track record for gross invasions of privacy, sudden non-consensual shifts in policy, and a total lack of transparency?

Right now, I’m locked out of my Facebook account, which means I don’t have access to my contacts, my writing and my photo albums. There is no word on why I was banned, nor any indication of when my access will be restored, if ever. I can’t imagine how much worse it would be if Facebook were also my email provider. Once the new Facebook phone comes out, a person could, in theory, turn all of the tools for his mediated communication over to a single, largely unaccountable company. One’s entire public face could be privately owned. (And don’t forget, this is not an Onion headline: Zuckerberg really does want to trademark the word “face.“)

So fuck Facebook’s growing monopoly and praise the Web godz for Twitter and WordPress where I am still free to find and post viral videos, depressing news stories and funny links. And praise also be to Friendster, where I can interact with my tiny dissident social network in near total privacy. It’s like the Guantanamo Bay Prison of social media. (By the way, I have been looking at your neglected profiles, circa 2003-2005 and y’all were beautiful.)

Here’s some good stuff via the interwebs.

Stormtroopers in love.

Love Will Tear Us Apart, sung by a Tuvan throatsinger.

Privilege Denying Dude

In other news…

It was reported that an Iraq War whistleblower in the UK was likely murdered (as he himself predicted), former President Jimmy Carter provided material support to terrorists (a federal crime in the United States of Hope & Change), a cat stared down a gator and construction began on the first Starbucks at Gitmo.


Mark Zuckerberg’s Friendster profile. “What I enjoy doing: Asian girls.”

November 15, 2010


Hey look! Fast, before it goes down the memory hole. It’s Mark Zuckerberg’s Friendster profile, circa 2003. OK, so this could be a fake, but it was created 7 years ago, before he was famous, so I’m willing to bet this is the real deal.


Here’s a taste:

What I enjoy doing:
coding, guitar, asian girls, squid, in n out, defeating nemeses, quoting top gun, bad life decisions

Favorite Books:
i don’t read

Ever the charmer!

And dig this from his “About Me” section: “I support the free flow of information.”

Please support the free flow of my information, Mark.

I am suffering from a Facebook disability

November 12, 2010

Tried to log in to Facebook about 20 minutes ago and was faced with this screen. I wrote to them asking for an explanation of how exactly I violated their policies, but am not optimistic about getting a satisfactory answer. My hope is that I can at least get them to turn over my original writing and photo content, much of which I did not save. For now, I’ll be moving my online voice and blogging here. I also tweet halfheartedly here. You can also join me at Friendster, where no one has posted a cute cat viral video all day.

Oh, and  please enjoy the  Obama WTF 2.0 meme, which now has over 8,000 likes on Facebook. Or so they tell me.

UPDATE: A  lovely friend has created this fan page to help me gain access to my disabled account. If you’re on FB, please consider “liking” this.


WTF has Obama done so far 2.0?

November 8, 2010

My supplement to the popular WTF Has Obama Done So Far meme.


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